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  1. Latest - The Onion

    1 day ago · News Pros And Cons Of Drug Advertising The U.S. and New Zealand are the only two countries in the world that allow direct-to-consumer prescription drug advertising. The …

  2. Breaking News: All Online Data Lost After Internet Crash - The Onion

    Jul 2, 2007 · Officials confirm that all online data has been lost after the Internet crashed and was forced to restart.

  3. Today Now Archives - The Onion

    Feb 16, 2026 · Today Now Become A Member Of The Last Functioning Part Of Our Democracy. Join The Onion Today

  4. News Archives - The Onion

    3 days ago · SAN ANTONIO—Remarking upon the charmed existence he had led since changing his course in life, former illustrator Allan Mansour confirmed…

  5. The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Gregory Bovino

    Jan 27, 2026 · The Onion sat down with Bovino to discuss his career at the agency. The Onion: What would you say to people who call you Gestapo? Bovino: I’d ask why they aren’t speaking …

  6. Politics Archives - The Onion

    1 day ago · WILMINGTON, DE—Expressing relief about his obliviousness to America’s unraveling, former President Joe Biden told reporters Thursday that he was grateful not to be …

  7. Local Archives - The Onion

    2 days ago · Local Dog Must Make Split-Second Decision Whether To Kill Or Show Tummy To Visitor Become A Member Of The Last Functioning Part Of Our Democracy. Join The Onion …

  8. Latest - Page 2 of 3382 - The Onion

    2 days ago · SIOUX CITY, IA—Making the dire prediction shortly after being terminated for substandard work, marketing analyst Ryan Bronson, who was laid off solely for performance …

  9. American Voices Archives - The Onion

    2 days ago · Like A Vitamin You Ingest With Your Eyes. Get The Onion Newsletter

  10. The Onion Film Standard: ‘28 Years Later’

    Jul 11, 2025 · Onion Film Standard The Onion Film Standard: ‘28 Years Later’ If playback doesn't begin shortly, try restarting your device.